By Antonio Lorenzo:
“Guillermo Weickert arranged two rows of chairs facing each other across the room, and made each of us sit in one, in pairs, face to face. He urged us to get close to him, to stick our forehead and our nose to his partner’s. , Stuck our eyes in our eyes, and hold our hands in each other’s face.That’s how we left, and so we stayed for a time that seemed infinite at times.The position of the bodies sitting on the chair, the posture to make our Faces, the tension of sharing such intimacy with a stranger, the breath of one in the other, our intimate smell, the look without a vanishing point … everything added to increase the uneasiness. In the open legs, in the raised arms, in the forward lumbar … Desire to escape, and commitment to follow.
Monsters appeared before the eyes, and the person in front became a cyclops with one eye, and at times a strange being with three. The body pain increased; the restlessness, and the desire for escape, of an exit, became greater. Do not worry, said William. Soon this will be over, he went on, and my mind, in spite of the affection I had already taken in the previous days, could not help complaining, I shit on the ostia, this Guillermo, will be bastard. ..
After a little difficult time, he told us to synchronize inhalation and exhalation with the rest of the exercise partners.
Suddenly he heard her; The fronts and noses remained attached to those of the companion, the pupils nailed, the hands on the cheeks of the other, the bodies forced in their posture, the same breaths, smells, heat, pain. But now the focus was on something else, something bigger, the being that we were all formed.
The breaths were synchronized, a single being that breathes, a single breath that makes a being.
And while this was happening, I realized that the discomforts and pains were fading, passing into the background, becoming less important, until they became insignificant. Yes, those pains that I used to fuck in the beard of that accursed Guillermo, those same pains so important at the time, had disappeared?
To lose the importance of one, in the bosom of something bigger.
After the intensity of the exercise I sat down to take a deep breath, and I felt clearly how many times in my life this had happened to me, how the problems that hurt me and seemed to constitute the whole world around me, how when changing the focus, and looking beyond me, those problems disappeared.
Pain, suffering, the desire for escape, feeling no way out, the awakening of rage, hatred, all of this can be out of control, and can also be used to generate an explosion, a burst of anger, violence. This way you can get a person to get into a van and murder everyone who had the misfortune to walk along the Rambla at that time.
I really hope that the day will come when we realize that we belong to something bigger, and our pains as a Muslim, Catalan, Real Madrid, precarious, scholar, director, woman, divorcee without custody, son Forgotten, of artist without perspectives, of whatever it is that afflicts our lives, all this transcended in our conscience to be generating a common breathing, between all the people, between all the life that is in the planet, and then the ignorance and hatred of difference becomes the support and care of the other, because it is one.
I come to mind and blood the words of Marlene Jöbst, put at the service of something bigger, put at the service of life, art …
I also resonate with my own body experience in which one can leave his body, let another manipulate it at will, and enjoy the experience and mutual learning. And that is only possible because you feel cared for the other. The abandonment of one in the care of the other.
So let us take care, let us take care to be cared for, to be able to abandon ourselves, to forget our importance, and to transcend, placed in the service of something greater.
The abandonment of one in the care of the other, at the service of the whole.